Charivari

Wedding of the year

Some weeks ago the Sunday Mirror printed an interview with Dr Elizabeth Rees, an Englishwoman who claimed to have become President Gaddafi's third wife in a secret ceremony in Libya. After spending a short time in the country she returned home, declaring that she had married the Libyan leader, whom she had first met when he was a junior officer on a short course in Britain, for political reasons. "I hoped that by his marriage to a Western woman Libya would become more orientated to the West."

Dr Rees's story was denied by the Libyan authorities and, in the absence of proof positive, it is impossible to be sure whether she was, as they said, talking nonsense or whether Gaddafi had rapidly repented of his reorientation. But, whatever the truth of the matter, her example, or what she said was her example, did not go unnoticed. In lands far from Libya the idea of a politically much more important marriage was hatched.

The ceremony was performed at King Hussein's palace in Amman only this week. And all possible steps were taken to keep it, for the time being, as secret as the Rees-Gaddafi wedding. The Jordanians reckoned without the skill and influence of this column's Hindsight team of reporters. Thanks to their outstanding work, I am now able to disclose the sensational news well ahead of any official announcement.

The bridegroom was none other than the King himself. He, of course, like Gaddafi, was already married, but Islamic law allows him four wives, as Dr Rees could explain to those who don't know it. The bride arrived by helicopter shortly before the ceremony and, strangely, was whisked away again shortly afterwards. She remained heavily veiled throughout, making it difficult for Hindsight's man at court to identify her with certitude.

What he could be sure of, despite her enveloping robes and veil was that she was no longer a young woman and that her command of Arabic was poor. Climbing stiffly down from the helicopter she knocked herself and exclaimed "Oy gevalt," an expression unknown in any Arabic dialect.

Before she climbed back into the helicopter the couple embraced, and our man was able to overhear a few scraps of their conversation. To his surprise both were speaking English.

"Hussi," said the woman, "remember I'm expecting you at my place at the same time as Henry and Dick. I'll give you all chopped liver and lokshen soup like you never tasted before."

"Golda," said the King, "it's been a pleasure marrying you. May I say that even before today I always thought of you as a Queen."

"Queen, shmeen," replied the old lady, "what does it matter as long as people do what I tell them?"

The secret was out, and Hindsight's information-gathering machine went into top gear

to build up the background to the event.

Research in Israel. Jordan and the United States has now revealed that the decision to make Golda Meir Queen of Jordan was taken at the direct instigation of Henry Kissinger — who elSe! — and that it is intended to announce her new position at the end of President Nixon's visit to the Middle East.

That, however, is only the first phase of the scheme, which can fairly be called the American Secretary of State's most audacious yet. According to a close confidant of the Queen, she will take over the reins of govern ment in Amman — for which her experience and abilities perfectly qualify her — while her new husband takes up residence in Israel the better to prepare himself for his forthcoming conversion to Judaism.

As a Jew and the husband of Queen Golda of Jordan, he hopes to receive mass support for his accession to the throne of Israel, which has been vacant for some thousands of years. The question of monogamy, that modern perver sion of Judaism, may cause some trouble, but he will if necessary divorce his other (Arab) wife and go through a second wedding with Golda in a synagogue.

Naturally, the Israelis would accept only a constitutional monarch, and there would be no question of King Hussein's exercising the same powers to the west of the River Jordan as he and Queen Golda would continue for a time to exercise to its east. However, the two realms would be drawn together into first a federal and ultimately a unitary kingdom.

For the expectation is that the King's conversion would be followed within two or three years by that of the majority of Jordanian citizens who would, under Israel's Law of the Return, be able to claim Israeli nationality and full rights within the combined State. Old Jewish fears of being swamped by an Arab majority would become obsolete since the Arabs in Greater Israel would now all be Jews.

That, at any rate, is the scheme. It is realised that not everyone will be inclined to support it. On the Jewish side Moshe Dayan is expected to be not the only one who may reckon that others than Hussein have a better claim to become King of Israel. On the Arab side Yasser Arafat and the other Palestinian leaders are bound to object to an arrangement which will deny them any share of power. And it is possible that President Sadat, who Hindsight learns has already got wind of the scheme, may try to use his influence with Kissinger to nip it in the bud.

As we go to press the latest word from Washington is that a Plan B is being considered under which Kissinger himself would become President of a Middle East Confederation comprising Egypt, Israel, Syria and Jordan, and the scheme outlined above would be scrapped. If Plan B is adopted, you can be sure that there will be an attempt to hush up the Golda-Hussein marriage and proceed as if it had never happened. In that case this column will no doubt be accused of talking nonsense, in the same way that Dr Rees was accused by the Libyans of doing so. It will be alleged that no seventysix-year-old woman would dream of marrying a man yo.ung enough 'to be her son. Never mind. Whatever happens, I wish the happY couple the best of luck.

Chad Babble