6 DECEMBER 2003, Page 42

From Peter Burden Sir: The Vole leaves us suspended (29

November) in his failure to reveal if any of Richard Desmond's minions had the presence of mind to utter the obvious response to the distinguished publisher's enquiry, 'I wonder what that fucking cormorant's thinking?'

'It's probably thinking it feels like a shag.'

Peter Burden

Sutton Saint Nicholas, Herefordshire