PORTRAIT OF THE WEEK
Jesus wants us for a sunbeam . .
In spite of long delays aboard a Virgin train, the Labour party succeeded in gath- ering at Blackpool for its annual confer- ence. Reacting to news of more job losses, Mr Blair warned his party to prepare for unpopularity. A group of left-wing activists known as the Grassroots Alliance embar- rassed the leadership by winning four of the six seats up for grabs in the constituency section of the party's National Executive; one of the victorious candidates, Liz Davies, had been banned from standing as an MP in the general election. Mr Blair announced the introduction of a 'zero toler- ance' policy — for the police as well as the Labour leadership. The Church of England proposed to lift its ban on divorcees marrying in church. Marylebone Cricket Club voted to admit women for the first time in 211 years; a few playing members may be allowed to join within three years but others will have to join the 18-year waiting list. The government was considering using empty barrack buildings for housing a growing number of asylum-seekers from Albania and Kosovo, part of the former Yugoslavia. Four hundred partners and managing direc- tors of Goldman Sachs lost out on bonus payments worth millions of pounds each when the investment bank suspended plans to float on the Stock Exchange in view of international financial turmoil. Lord Archer of Weston-super-Mare drafted a backbench bill which could lead to England and Scot- land adopting different time zones. A Nor- wich woman was granted police protection after receiving death threats for describing the people of Norfolk as boring. Will Car- ling, the former England rugby union cap- tain, left his latest live-in lover on the eve of their wedding; he later blamed his attitude towards women on his old school, Sedburgh, saying the single-sex environment made girls seem like 'alien creatures'. A 91-year-old waterskier was prescribed the anti- impotence pill Viagra.
GERHARD SCHRODER became Ger- many's Chancellor after his Social Demo- crat party polled 41 per cent of votes in the general election, and formed a coalition with the Green party. The deposed chan- cellor, Helmut Kohl, who had held the post for longer than anyone bar Bismarck, promptly announced his retirement as lead- er of the Christian Democrat party. Nine years after the late Ayatollah Khomeini placed a fatwa on author Salman Rushdie over supposedly blasphemous passages in his novel The Satanic Verses, the Iranian government announced that it had no intention of colluding in Rushdie's murder. Rushdie immediately said, 'It means free- dom,' though Iran's foreign minister begged to differ, saying that Rushdie had increased the hatred of Muslims towards him by saying he was still proud of his book. Vatican officials began preparations for the Pope to apologise for the Crusades and many other sins committed by the Church over the past 2,000 years. An Australian man who lost his hand in a chainsaw acci- dent nine years ago underwent the world's first hand transplant at a hospital in Paris. Millions of Americans fled from Hurricane Georges. The storm had overturned house- boats and upended trailers in Florida and was thought to be making for New Orleans, most of which lies below sea level, but it veered away at the last moment. A body called the Assassination Records Review Board released 33,000 files on the death of President Kennedy, including floor tiles from the hospital where he died, in an attempt to put an end to conspiracy theo- ries. Rome tried to ban motor scooters from its streets, but gave up when thou- sands took to the streets in protest. Tom Monaghan, who made a billion-dollar for- tune from an American pizza chain, gave away most of his money to charity, saying, 'I realised how bad a person I really am.' Pubs and clubs in the Israeli resort of Haifa have been advertising for staff in Birming- ham newspapers as it has become trendy to have a Brummie accent. Betty Carter, the jazz singer, died, aged 69.
RJC
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