Triple heart bypass fan
Sir: Liz Hodgkinson has got it right (The joy of illness. Illness can be a rewarding state for many. But there is an eventual price to be paid for the pleasure and indul- gence of infantile regression to a depen- dent state of immediate gratification and admiration. Never having been in hospital for 35 years, my triple heart bypass opera- tion gave me the lot. Intensive care was especially exhilarating. Even most of my waste products were taken away by pipes and tubes, and everything I needed for sur- vival was inserted through other tubes; 24- hour, one-to-one nursing meant that every little twitch was attended to, accompanied by an interesting commentary of Jesuitical intensity from the technicians to explain, improve and discuss the remarkable things being done to my body.
And there were opportunities for a hero- ic stance. Stoicism when large drainage tubes were withdrawn from the wound, and the casual exposure of horrific leg wounds and descriptions of the cutting of the ster- num to access the heart, brought more admiring glances for my bravery than I had ever known.
But when it is all over, the withdrawal symptoms are awful, as you come back to a world that expects you to go on as before. The not insignificant incidence of deep reactive depression after this operation is the price to be paid for the narcissism which it encourages. But if you are in the media, you can, as demonstrated by Michael Winner, keep the pleasure going longer — until hopefully you pass out of danger from depression, or sadly, for those with terminal illnesses, shuffle off. . .
Rex Cowan Undersea Search and Location, 38 Gayton Road, London NW3
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