Westminster Corridors
So mighty a Dominance have our present Alchemists and Fanaticks obtained over Publick Affairs that any Oration that partakes of the Dross and Grossness of Reason and Common Sense doth by Contrast seem itself to be a Fanatick Enterprise and Offensive to Respecta ble Opinion. Fresh Illustration of this undoubted Truth hath lately been provided by the Outrage occasioned among Prelates, Place-seekers and Hacks by the Sermon upon Morality of Sir Keith Joseph, who was justly reckoned as a Friend to the Poor in the late Administration.
In this Address, the noble Privy Councillor demolished a reasonable Amount of Cant and slew certain Sophistries, viz.: that, in our Colleges, Freedom is so Precious that it should be Rationed among Levellers, Fifth Monarchy Men and Others of Like Temper, and not otherwise. Yet his Principal Complaint was that All Ranks and Classes had been encouraged to abandon old Restraints on their Appetites, that much Misery had been Caused thereby, in particular to Solitary, Young, Unwed Mothers of the Lower Orders, and that perhaps it were better for them, their Children and their Neighbours that they should Employ Mechani cal and Chemical Contrivances to cheat Procreation than that they should Bring Children into so Cold, Mean and Disordered an Inheritance.
In consequence whereof, he was at once assailed by Malignants of the Opposite Factions as One who would Imitate Herod or Apply the Callous Stratagems of Attila. Though they had themselves long Clamoured for the Free and Plentiful Supply of Contrivances designed to inhibit Conception, yet they did interpret his Concurrence as Clear' Proof that he would Regulate the Breeding of the Poor as that of Horses, if not Worse Projects. And nonsense of Every Sort was talked and to all appearances believed.
Master Frank Field, who looks to the Poor as Others regard their Game, namely as a private Preserve on which it is trespassing to Intrude. declared that Sir Keith had Misread the Figures, also that the Compilers of these Figures, if they Agreed with Sir Keith, had misread them no less Seriously, and that Those, like Sir Keith. who rejected his Remedies for the Condition of the Poor were evidently Bent on Genocide, and that it was Evil to search for Scapegoats.
Neither did the Reverend Augustine Harris, a Bishop of the Romish Church, speak with greater Charity. For he charged that Sir Keith would manipulate the People as they were Pawns on a Board, it being the Popish view that Men are Capable of Free Decisions only if they remain in Ignorance of the Various Methods that may be employed to Prevent Births, Then would Mistress Castle enter the Fray to deplore the Injustice of Singling out Girls from the Lower Orders as Immoral. For (said She) it had been Demonstrated by an Opinion Poll that Girls of the Middling and Gentry Classes had greater experience at Fornication; but she had not Logick enough to realise that this Evidence. if held to be True, Along with the Fewer Births to these Classes, Proved Sir Keith's Argument For Extending Knowledge of Artificial Control to these Involuntary Mothers. And bringing up the Rear of this Crusade, Master Peter Jenkins, the illustrious Grub Street Philosopher, astonished the World with his Claim that many, if not all, the Evils castigated by the Privy Councillor, had been seen in Past Ages, wherefrom it were Hypocrisy to Point now to their Flowering, and similar Reflections.
In face of the Din and Uproar from this Rabble of Radicals, the Tories displayed the Courage that has lately become their Hallmark, viz: they Cowered Behind the Scenes and Uttered Quiet Whispers of Support and Encouragement to Sir Keith. And among them moved Sycophants of Master Heath and Puffers of Master Whitelaw, not infrequently combining both Offices in the One Person, who persuaded thus: Observe, Pray, what Trouble and Disturbance are stirred up by Ideas. How much more Prudent to Dispense
with them Entirely, or to Make Use Only. of the
Common Stock that Affronts None excepting our Wretched Followers, and in this Manner Benefit from the Seasonal Fluctations of Publick Affairs,
Tom Puzzle
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