,,Westminster Commentary
THE game of quoting Henry V, which was begun by Lord Hinchingbrooke towards the end of the first day of the Suez debate, and reached truly im- Nevertheless, one or two things emerge, the least significant of which are the eight who have emerged from the Parliamentary Conservative Party; though Mr. Oliver Poole's remarks on the subject are perhaps worthy of comment. Refusing to intervene between the rebels and their local associations, he declared boldly that the Conserva- tive Party was best served by men of independent views. He then proceeded to scatter about a few broad hints, from which it was not hard to deduce that the eight would not be hunted down, and that official Tory candidates would not be put up against them in the event (unlikely, in any case, to the point of absurdity) that they had not found pressing reasons for rejoining long before the elec- tion. Brave words from Mr. Poole, and those with exceedingly short memories (say the average Member of Parliament) might have believed that it was always so. But was it? What cheer has Mr. Nigel Nicolson, who has not resigned the Whip and has no intention of doing so, ever had from Central Office in his struggle with as unappetising a group of local politicians as can ever have been seen outside Tammany Hall? What hint fell from Mr. Poole's lips to strengthen the belief of Sir Frank Medlicott that 'the party is best served by men of independent views'? The fact is, the Tories never mind revolts on the Right, since they know perfectly well that such demonstrations are the inevitable concomitant of progress; a number of members can always be relied upon to mistake progress and sanity for bloody revolution, and say so. But revolts on the Left can be dangerous, as the only successful one they have had this century demonstrated fairly conclusively to the late Neville Chamberlain. For at the eastern gate the lone and level sands stretch far away; but at the western portal stands the enemy, hungry for rapine, loot and office.
No, what one got from the closing stages of the Suez debate, apart from a suffocating sense of déjà-vu, was a melancholy conviction that they are now, on both sides, so punch-drunk with the subject that anybody can get away with anything. Well, Mr. Selwyn Lloyd got away without being beaten over the head with the mace, and when Mr. Macmillan had the almighty nerve to say that one of the reasons for difficulties in Anglo- American relations was that in the past 'statesmen on both sides of the Atlantic have not spoken as frankly to each other as they should have done,' nobody even gasped, let alone interrupted him. But he really should have been called to account for claiming that the Eisenhower Doctrine emerged from the Bermuda Conference, which it in fact ante-dated by some months. There were compensations, of course. High on the list I should put Mr. Walter Elliot's attempt, just before the Prime Minister rose to bring the whole sorry nonsense to an end, to sit down. Entering, he found his usual seat occupied, and by Dame Florence Horsbrugh at that. Nothing daunted, Mr. Elliot inserted his right hip between Dame Florence and the arm of the bench (Mr. Elliot sits at the end of the row) and gave her a vigorous shove. Poor Flo, propelled along the seat for a few inches, passed on the impetus to the man on her right, and the ripple flowed along the line until it reached some obstinate (and unfor- tunately unidentifiable) character in the middle. Mr. Elliot paused, then shoved again. Again the ripple flowed, and again it stuck. Another shove; the same result. The deadlock was broken by Dame Florence; understandably reluctant to have her pelvis dislocated, even to accommodate Mr. Walter Elliot, she wriggled forward and came to rest on theNdge of the seat. Mr. Elliot sank into his place...Joke over, except for the alacrity with which Dame Florence leaped to her feet to join in the demonstration for. Mr. Macmillan after the division. First to rise, by the way, was Lieutenant- Colonel Bromley-Davenport, whom I feel bound to describe, judging by his behaviour in this de- bate, as a vulgar and clownish fellow. Most mem- bers, even the prize fatheads, are content to cheer the good points made by their own side and snort at the bad ones made by the other. Bromley- Davenport yells at both like a Comanche, going puce in the face as he does so, and a great vein sticks out on his neck as though he had swallowed an octopus. Besides, he guffawed at Mr. Bevan's stammer; I haven't met anybody who thought a stammer was funny since I was seven years old.
And so the long trudge through the Finance Bill began. With thirty-two pages of amendments spoiling the cut of my jacket, I was in no mood to be charitable towards characters who wanted the Committee solemnly to debate the omission (or retention) of the word 'merely' in Clause 1, page 2, line 3, particularly since the clause would mean exactly the same with or without the dis- puted word. The schadenfreude I derived from the Temporary Chairman's failure to call this amendment was intense, therefore, but short- lived. This nonsense, after all, is going to go on for six weeks, and since no amendments, apart from drafting ones, are going to be accepted, and since everybody knows this as well as I do, not even the pleasure of hearing what I calculate will be at least twenty speeches from Professor Powell (a pleasure tempered with the realisation that there will be a similar number from Mr. Thorney- croft) is going to prevent me from reflecting that this is a hell of a way to run a railroad.
I can only pray that Mr. Gordon Walker will keep up the hypnotically fascinating game that he plays with his order paper. Opened out, one of these handy green sheets measures 141 inches by 91 inches; Mr. Gordon Walker rolls it delicately up from one corner till he has a wand some 16 inches in length. A surreptitious lick, and the wand may be handled without its unrolling. Another order paper is treated in the same way, and the result fitted carefully into the first. Then another, until he has a graceful, pencil-slim wand nearly four feet in length. And, indeed, colleagues of greater experience than I assure me that he has been known to construct a rod so long that he could tickle the Serjeant-at-Arms without taking his feet off the table. How much more entertain-. ing, not to say harmless, an occupation than making speeches on the Finance Bill! TAPER
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