Changes and sex changes for Santa

Geoffrey Humphrys

In December, the big stores of London and most big cities add a further name to their staff lists: Father Christmas. But the past few years have been times of change for Santa; for whereas it was once a traditional red-robed, white-whiskered old gentleman who took up his December stand, modern Santas have become younger and, in some cases, undergone a change of sex.

Old-age pensioners used to fill the, seasonal role, but in recent years many have hung up their beards and opted out. This is because most older men cannot cope with wearing the heavy robes and trimmings for long hours in stuffy, crowded centrally-heated stores.

The traditional Santa Claus image is about 5ft 8in tall, able to read without glasses, looks about seventy when made up and has a forty-eight-inch waist bolstered by pillows. Each year such characters have become harder to find. Hence the emergence of younger men, some of them minor role actors*. Perhaps it was inevitable that even before Women's Lib became a familiar term a woman should be appointed to fill the role.

This first happened when a store at Allenton, Derby, appointed a mother of three children to be its December Santa. She wore the traditional garb, so there was no question of calling her Mother Christmas, as all signs of feminity were hidden beneath the robes.

There were no such pretensions at a store in Richmond, Surrey, when a girl called Deirdre O'Dea took over the role of Santa for one day. The red robe did conceal secrets, but only partially, for it was plain for all .to see that Deirdre, a former Windmill girl, wore a silver bikini beneath. This flimsy apparel was given to her as a memento, not by Santa Claus, but the manage

ment of the famous London revue theatre, when it gave up trying to compete with the strip clubs which had sprung up like mushrooms around it. Not surprisingly, plenty of Richmond dads suddenly became interested in the activities of Santa Claus. It was reported that there had. seldom been such a queue of paternal holders of the hands of their progeny as they awaited an interview with Santa.

During December 1968, some alert youngsters visiting a Maidenhead store would also have discovered that Santa had sensationally become a girl — the red robe and white beard hiding a pretty young woman named Jo Allen. And about the same time a similar reversal of roles occurred further north, where blonde June Lamper not only became Santa, but revolutionised his garb. This young woman revealed rather than concealed her 36-24-36 shapeliness in a red mini-shift trimmed with feathers.

Traditionally, this female Santa distributed gifts, but not to children. A receptionist with a Sheffield cutlery firm, she greeted passengers arriving from London at Sheffield Midland Station. Her gifts were cutlery and silverware, part of a campaign to advertise the products for which Sheffield has long been famous. She also preened her feathers daily at one of the city's hotels as part of the publicity campaign. _ .

Perhaps more exciting to some of the scientifically-minded whizzkids of today, if not their dads, was the Santa installed in a New York store. Neither he nor she, 'it' stood seven feet tall, weighed 380lb and had a six-volt battery for a heart. Its outer metal casing was covered by the conventional hooded red cloak and its metallic face fringed with a white beard. Every day, streams of children gazed up at the robot Santa, open-mouthedly acknowledging the smiles it flashed at them by means of a built-in cathode tube, and listening to its "Merry Christmas" greeting sounding out from an internal transmitter. The scientific Santa also rang a bell with one hand and distributed candy bars with the other. Science had its own name for the robot — Thodar, derived from Radio Operated Hifrequency Transmission spent backwards.

Competition from robots and glamour girls makes it difficult for Father Christmases of 1974. It is a job that calls for an unqualified love of children combined with inexhaustible patience. Most of the youngsters know that the white beard can be pulled off and are anxious to prove it. Such mischievous hands have to be arrested from their impish intent in a benign handshake.

Having a job as Santa in a large store throughout December has been likened to a month's hard labour, so it is not surprising that some standards have fallen. Last year, for instance, a fully-robed Santa was seen standing in the queue at the self-service counter of a store restaurant, another surprised young boy p by joining them in the gentlemen's toilet, and yet another reeked of beer fumes after lunch.

In the eyes of the very young, Father Christmas is someone very special, so the wearers of the robe must try to preserve the image. Few can deny that it must be difficult at times, for every year the clientele becomes more sophisticated. Apart from making requests for all the paraphernalia of space travel, underwater exploration and banditry, several young lads are keen on asking Santa to eliminate big sisters, repressive fathers, interfering aunts and other relatives or neighbours who can be the bane of a child's life.

There have been numerous complaints in recent years about the sub-standard toys distributed by Father Christmases in various stores. An official of the British Safety Council made a survey of twenty-five stores and reported that he was "appalled by the dangerous and shoddy playthings" handed out by Father Christmas. The general attitude of the management was that the public could not expect anything else for what it paid.

There has been so much discontent in the Santa Claus world that a Father Christmas Union was formed in 1969. It may be recalled that the original twelve members, nine men and three women, were so disgusted at the way children were being conned that they staged a strike outside a London store. They were finally arrested for obstructing the pavement, then released on bail.

One thing every year is certain: those who have spent a month trying to spread seasonal joy among the youngsters have had enough by December 24 and take off their red cloaks and white beards with a huge sigh of relief. Even Thodars, too, may be ready to have their heart batteries recharged.