YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED
Q. My mother, at 90, was greatly offended when staff used her Christian name from the moment she arrived in hospital. My own doctor one day greeted me at his Surgery with 'Hello, Ben.' So as not to be at a disadvantage, I ascertained his first name from the office and used it on my next visit. He has never used mine since. On another occasion, the nurse of the practice called me into her room with the words, 'Come in, Ben.' Since I have lived in the village for 25 Years I thought she probably knew me. However, when I telephoned to remind her of something, she said, 'You can hardly expect me to remember everyone who comes in here!' The patient finds himself inherently one-down in a permanent sell- er's market. What is the best way to deal with the doubtless well-meant familiarities of public servants?
B.S.G., Rutland 4. On his retirement, an elderly physician of my acquaintance found himself subject- ed to the same indignity. In his working
years, he had enjoyed the deference natu- rally accorded by hospital staff to someone of his rank and seniority. Five years after his retirement, however, he had a stroke and was admitted to the hospital where he had worked on and off for 40 years. He found himself being tended by young whip- persnappers who were addressing him patronisingly as 'Tom'. This only served to intensify his feeling of impotence. His wife consulted me before his next admittance to hospital, and I advised the following solu- tion to the problem. She asked the egalitar- ian staff to refer to him by his nickname as this would make him feel more at ease. 'Of course,' they said. 'What is his nickname?' `Sir,' she replied. Women can use the same solution, pretending that their nickname is `Madam'.
Q. M.H. of Collingbourne Duds (27 March) understandably objects to licking postage stamps that have been passed sticky side down on a dirty post office counter. He must similarly deplore the way in which ice-cream comets (cones) are served from shops and mobile vehicles. In Trier, Germany, the untouched cone is wrapped in a paper serviette before ice- cream is added. Meanwhile, until hygiene improves here, eat the ice-cream and throw away the cornet.
Eastleigh, Hampshire A. Thank you for drawing readers' atten- tion to this hygiene hazard. No doubt many of them will have previously overlooked it.
Mary Killen
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