New life
On the trail of the Wallaby
Zenga Longmore
As a special treat,' announced Boko to her three children last Saturday, 'Y" can go out shopping with Aunty.' Rousing hoorays rent the air. Oma- lara began to clap and, for .a moment, I almost found myself joining in the merry chorus, until it dawned, with a sickening jolt, that I was that Aunty.
'You're not busy today, are you?' said Boko, helping three-year-old Comfort on with her coat.
`Well, actually, I've got an urgent `It can wait. Now you're taking them to the High Street where you're buying Elike a pair of . . .' and she said something which didn't seem to make any sense. It sounded rather like 'Pony Ozone High Tech Wallabies'. Before I had time to ask her to repeat this strange utterance, Elike, the eight-year-old professor of fashion, flew into the air like a preacher who has seen the light. 'High Tech Wallabies! On time! You should see the wicked grips, man! Coo-oo-ool!'
The prospect of seeing their brother clad in Wallabies stirred up feelings of wild excitement in Kuba and Comfort. Scream- ing with joy, they charged from the flat, High Street bound. After a great deal of noisy debate over which Care Bear comic belonged to whom, we found ourselves in an overcrowded chain-store. Elike at once set up a whine becuse of my inability to locate the Wallaby department quickly enough, and the little girls began a night- marish game of hide and seek. Clothes, mannequins and shop assistants became Unwilling props for their heavy-handed frolics. At one point, Kuba, operating the arms of a mannequin in a shimmery number from Paris, caused the benighted dummy to come crashing to the ground. Plastic arms, legs and bits of shimmer lay around in grotesque profusion. `Sor-ree,' I heard Kuba chirping before she disappeared behind a cash desk. `That's quite all right, madame, I assure you you won't have to pay for the damage,' said the manager, throwing me a taut smile. 'Why, how much do these things cost?"0h, around £3,000.'
My one solace came from watching other mothers trying to cope with their boister- ous young. Every conceivable method of control was employed: wheedling, black- Mail and straightforward lashing out. How lovely if just one of the shops contained a kiddy something or other to amuse the children. Due to popular demand, many large department stores now have baby changing and feeding rooms hidden away in their darkest recesses, so why not provide a special area for bigger children? Last Saturday, what I had in mind was something along the lines of the dog cages Which lie in the basement of Harrods, but You must remember that last Saturday I was in a fraught state of mind. In the cold light of day, I rather think a simple rocking horse and Wendy house would suffice. The Wallabies turned out to be a sort of green shoe, and that purchased, how grate- ful I was to clamber into a bus and collapse at Boko's flat with everyone in one piece. `The kids enjoyed their day so much, I think it might be a good idea if you took them shopping every week,' suggested Boko.
`Gla gla n'na m'ma oobah ga ga,' said Omalara.
I had nothing to add.
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