PAROCHIAL STORIES.
[To the Editor of the SPECTATOR.] Sin,—Since doubtless some of your readers are collecting and classifying these stories, as is well worth while, I should he sorry to let mere indolence prevent me from adding to the collection. I shall offer two instances of unexpected turns of expression. The first is of recent date. Mrs. Wood gave notice, according to custom, of her coming to be " churched," but did not appear. Happening to be near her house on the same afternoon, I made a call, and learned that she was in bed. I went to the foot of the stairs and, in a sufficiently loud voice, asked what had kept her from the churching. Impatient at the density of a bachelor rector, she called out in answer : "Why 1 the baby was only born at half-past ten : we can't do everything." The Mrs. Wood I had meant to visit lived three doors away, and the babies were a coincidence. Now for the other. I am a man of robust health and left my last parish after a long term of years without having missed a day's work, or taken a holiday. A very intelligent old lady, who had educated herself, bade me farewell, and said : "I think you are the most indelicate gentleman I have ever known."—I am, Sir, dm., E.G. S.
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